OooohKAY! You saucy smooth operators.
I have to take a moment to say bravo to all the spankin' new and OG clients I saw in the studio last week. If you were new to the studio and me, thank you for marching up those three stories to a little Pilates gem on top of Fremont - and trying something new! For my regulars, you really took the idea of grace and ran with it.
As some of you may know Pilatecising is now on ClassPass!! I'll be honest, much like anyone, I am hesitant heading into change. So looking at the roster of completely new names I was both so freakin' excited and nervous as hell. Fully expecting a week of clunkiness, feeling like gurgling engine after being away for so long. BUT! Following last week's theme, I gave myself the grace to not have to be perfect. Set aside any expectations of flawless instruction and seamless flows. I realized by me doing that it set a tone. I was giving the clients permission, new and experienced, to do the same. Classes felt lighter and just FUN. Nothing was expected and everything was a playful experiment. Feeling less like I was conducting a well rehearsed orchestra, but rather a fan gently suggesting direction changes to a room of dancing balloons. Sure there were moments of going the wrong direction, bouncing and giggling off each other. But when the pressure is taken out, grace starts to drive. No heavy hang ups or clinging onto any mistakes. No distinction between the new bodies and experienced bodies. Now this doesn't mean the workouts were easy. That ability to free ourselves of our own judgement means folks actually go harder. Less afraid to go places they don't usually go to. So despite my concerns, classes were really awesome and, dare I say, VERY smooth.
During my time away last month I actually managed to take a lot of equipment and mat Pilates classes. Which when you teach a lot you sometimes forget to be a student yourself. Without any research, word of mouth, or referrals I just clicked on a class and a random instructor, and showed up! So not that long ago I experienced being on the other side of things...and no! Being an instructor does NOT automatically make you immune to nerves, pre-class "what the hell did I just sign up for!?!" I tried to fully experience each studio, so for each one I booked more than once, as well as switched it up. I was like a little Pilates Goldilocks ... bouncing around and comparing studios all around Berlin. I have to say it was fascinating. Finding them was half the adventure, a drippy alley way and graffiti walls, and a secret knock to get in (not even kidding). However once you enter it's a totally unpredictable aesthetic - all different tones and textures.
The first studio looked like a combination of a university's Chemistry department and the set of The Jetsons ... and smelled like cue tips. The instructor there was very experienced and taught a pretty advanced class flow. When I think of my checklist of what I love in an instructor - all the things seemed to be there. However I kept thinking about the clock, even though it felt effective it didn't feel cathartic. I couldn't put a finger on why that was - but I was very ready for it to be over.
Then the next studio I went to was like a SPA! So pretty, the class was more all-levels, the instructor's face was softer, she did not go as deep, and time flew! The class had such fun-loving energy and an easy banter with the instructor. BUT it was missing that "a-ha" moment in my body. I did not have that feeling of pulling from untapped strength or clever new muscle work.
The third experience was an experienced instructor, the class flow had perfect variety and a beautiful ramp up, the space was gorgeous and relaxing ... this is the part where Goldilocks finds the best match and settles into her new perfect spot. HOWEVER! Once again I can't put a finger on what exactly it was that left me lackluster. Still I was unenthusiastic about the workout. Even though the moves themselves were challenging and the instructor was saying all the right things, my body and brain were still bored.
I mean the conclusion could very well be that I'm just a picky pickle! Plus - it's all completely relative. My silly needs could be very different from someone else's. However it was really bothering me that I couldn't put my finger on what was missing for me. Just to know for myself as an instructor always looking to be better. Then I remembered one thing I always tell other instructors who might be struggling with client connection or teaching inspiration - and remind MYSELF! That a studio is not just a place you go, a teacher isn't just a person you go to - it's a relationship. When you think if it that way it does change how you teach and approach a class. It also changes how you experience a class as a student.
A good relationship has that combination of wanting to feel met where you are but then also pushed to unchartered territory. A trusting place where you feel safe but also challenged to flex your undiscovered strengths. Esther Perel, a psychotherapist and expert on romantic relationships, talks about this all the time. Highly recommend going down an Esther Perel podcast rabbit hole by the way, she's so spot on with her advice and many times her perspective has blown a hole through my own feelings stuckness or unhealthy autopilots in my relationships (in short I LOOOOVRE HERRR). She believes we meet another because we want to find ourselves but also a version of ourselves we did not know. We need security and a sense of adventure. I think studio relationships are exactly the same. In hindsight I think that's what was missing in my studio experience in Berlin. The place where I felt safe I did not feel pushed. The place where I felt pushed ... it smelled like cue tips so I didn't feel safe.
I think this is so helpful for any relationship you need to get more out of, or feel like Goldilocks and can't figure out what is missing. Whether it's your relationship to your studio and workout routine, your work relationships, your family, your marriage ... fill in the blank! Meet each other where you are and nudge each other to be a stronger version of yourselves. This week I will set a tone of security, grace, and loving energy. Then fill it with a texture of quality, variety, and honest strength work that truly pushes your stamina to go places you haven't gone yet. A sense of safety with boundary pushing. Then add what I think that third studio was missing ... undeniable spark!
Excited to make your bodies sweat, smile, and feel secure and strong in our studio relationship.
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